Nurse Wretched

Turn you head to the right and cough.  Now, dammit!  Or it's enema time.  If you don't cooperate I'll use the gloves I've been keeping in the freezer.  The other day I needed a pen to fill out my charts and all I could find in my pockets was a rectal thermometer  -- that must mean some asshole has my pen.  I'm a maven of modern medical miracles, a virtual harem of healing arts -- I've made a blind man lame.  I practice medicine for the fun of it!  Why, I've had patients knocking at death's door and I've pulled them through it.  So book me.  I'm the prescription for your next roast.